You know the feeling. One small thing goes wrong — someone’s tone in a meeting, an unexpected email, your child asking what’s for dinner — and suddenly, a wave crashes over you. You’re not just upset or annoyed. You’re flooded.
For people with ADHD, this kind of emotional overwhelm isn’t overreacting. It’s not being “too sensitive.” It’s a real part of how the ADHD brain processes emotion — and it’s exhausting.
What Is Emotional Overwhelm?
Emotional overwhelm occurs when your brain and body feel overloaded. In the space of a few minutes, you might feel tearful, angry, panicky, or frozen—or all of the above.
For some people, it shows up as snapping at someone you love. For others, it’s going completely quiet and shutting down. It can look like procrastination, overthinking, or suddenly feeling like you’re failing at everything.
And with ADHD, this kind of overwhelm can hit fast and hard — even if the trigger seems small.
Why Is It So Common in ADHD?
People with ADHD often experience something called emotional dysregulation — basically, the brain struggles to filter, manage, and respond to emotion in a balanced way.
This means:
- You might feel things more intensely
- It’s harder to let things go, even when you know you’re overthinking
- Your emotional responses can feel like they come out of nowhere
- Once you’re overwhelmed, it isn’t easy to shift out of it
You might also be dealing with rejection sensitivity (where even neutral feedback can feel personal), perfectionism, and years of feeling “too much.” It’s no wonder your nervous system is always on high alert.
How Emotional Overwhelm Shows Up
Everyone experiences it differently, but here are some common ways it shows up in my clients:
- Snapping or withdrawing in conversations
- Struggling to think clearly when under pressure
- Crying over things that feel “silly” later
- Panic when plans change suddenly
- Feeling like one small mistake ruins your whole day
- Avoiding tasks because you’re scared you’ll “mess them up.”
Sometimes, it’s unclear what triggered it — your brain hits capacity and flips the switch.
This Isn’t Just About Emotions — It’s About Capacity
The ADHD brain is constantly filtering noise, distractions, and stress. Add in hormones, poor sleep, work demands, or sensory overload — and suddenly, there’s just no room left to cope with anything else.
When you hit that wall, it’s not because you’re weak. It’s because your brain tries to protect you by shutting things down. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always pick the most helpful way to do that.
What Helps?
There’s no quick fix (and I’d never pretend there is). But over time, I’ve seen some key things make a real difference:
- Name it
- Sometimes, just saying “I’m overwhelmed” or “I’m at capacity” helps your brain register what’s happening. It creates a pause.
- Step away early
- Notice your early signs (tight chest, irritability, fidgeting, zoning out). Build in tiny breaks before the flood hits.
- Lower the bar
- This isn’t the time to power through. Ask yourself: What needs to happen right now, and what can wait?
- Practice self-praise
- Even if all you did was step away and not explode — that’s worth recognising.
- Work on long-term strategies
- In coaching, we often examine how to build resilience and reduce daily overload so that one does not constantly live on the edge of shutdown.
What Really Comes Up in ADHD Coaching Sessions
So many women I work with have spent years thinking they were too sensitive, reactive, or not resilient enough. But the truth is, their nervous systems have been running on empty for a long time.
Through coaching, we look at how to reduce that baseline pressure. That might mean tackling perfectionism, building realistic routines, working on emotional regulation, or simply learning to recognise your limits before you crash through them. If that feels familiar, I’ve written something that might help — 5 practical tips to make life easier.
You’re Not Too Much
If you’ve ever been told you’re overreacting, too emotional, or hard to handle — I want you to know this: you’re not too much. You’ve just been carrying too much.
And ADHD coaching can help you figure out what to put down.
Need Support?
If emotional overwhelm is a daily battle, you don’t have to keep pushing through alone. Coaching can give you practical tools and space to feel more in control — at Work, at home, and with yourself.
Book a discovery call if you’re ready to feel more supported, steady, and like yourself again.
